We went to Madeira for some winter sun, well for the most part. I thought it was a nice place. Very relaxing at that time of year.

One thing that surprised me was how steep this island was. It has reputation as a destination for the elder generation but I fail to see how they cope with all the steep hills unless they don't walk much or get taxis everywhere. I did hear one granny complain that she would never fly with her tour operator again because of it but I fail to see how the hell she could blame them for that! Some people, eh?

As we were flying from Gatwick on Monday morning I was a bit hesitant about driving up during the rush hour just in case there were any delays that could have thrown a spanner into the works. I decided to book an overnight stay at the 

As we were flying from Gatwick on Monday morning I was a bit hesitant about driving up during the rush hour just in case there were any delays that could have thrown a spanner into the works. I decided to book an overnight stay at the Hedgehog Inn near Gatwick. It was only £55 for the room including breakfast. They had a grill restaurant so I had a 16 ounce steak which set me up for the holiday.

Actually it made a nice gentle start to the holiday and saved a lot of early morning stress. We normally use APH Parking and they were only 5 mins away which was very handy. We might look at the Ramada Hotel option next time, as it could be around £65 for parking and room.

The flight took 3 hours. It was actually raining when we landed at Santa Cruz airport  so it was memories of Cyprus all over again.

We stayed at the Pestana Carlton Madeira hotel, and we were up on the top (18th) floor facing the mountains. On reflection I should have upgraded to sea views as although the road noise not too bad and there were nice views of the town lights at night it was quite noticeable especially when it was kicking out time at the night club opposite. It definitely was kicking off as there was some mad women screaming at each other around 2am! It was funny anyway.

We were on half board as the hotel seemingly had a good reputation for food. It wasn't bad but again I am not one for International Cuisine whatever that is, but they did have some Madeiran theme nights.

For me there were far too many restaurants just on the doorstep or in town to miss out on. For the cost of one person's evening meal at the restaurant you could have paid for two people with drinks down town.

17 Nov, Mon. 1st afternoon - We took a quick stroll around near the hotel and ended up at a restaurant called Jardin do Olimpic for lunch. Angela had the dourada fish wih banana for 7 euros, supposedly a local delicacy. I had a mixed fish skewer for 9 euros.

It was 1.10 euros for a beer outside and at the hotel it was 3 euros just to give some price comparisons. We had dinner at hotel, which was a 5 course meal. It was nice again. It was a five star restaurant so the service was as expected. Will end up getting very fat after 7 days of this! Even Angela couldn't face another fish.

2nd day. Weather was better today. We walked to the old town, past the marina and all the touts. Just grin and say hi, but carry on walking. Got to cable car station and had dinner at O Tapassol, as recommended by others on the net. Had limpets then estepada (skewered beef), very tender and nice, and dripping in garlic. Angela had the garlic squid. Beers at noon, that's what holidays are all about.

Went to market, very colourful (especially the fruits), and very fishy. Saw the famous scabbard fish up close. Big, black and looks eel-like. Big eyes and sharp teeth. Even the tour guide said that you should not see the fish before you eat it.

It was too much of a walk back so we got a taxi from town to the hotel for 3 euros, well worth it.

I liked the local beer which is called Coral. There is a stout version called Tonica which is worth trying.

3rd day - It was a nice clear hot day today so we sunbathed for about 3hrs. Pool was nice once you were in, but salty for some reason. We took a left out from the hotel and walked to Lido, dodging the timeshare touts over the bridge.

We popped into Crowne Plaza which looked very modern and minimalist. I think I might enjoy staying there as I really like the whole design (all done by Philippe Stark I believe) but it is a bit expensive and empty at the moment. Nothing much at the Lido but had nice snack at Qualifrutas, lots of fresh stuff with fruits.

4th day - We went on an excursion to West of the island. The route was very twisty and the coach drivers seem to know the roads like the back of their hands. Don't look over edge when going round all the hairpins!

Strange to go all the way up and end up on the plateau. It was very flat and unusual especially when compared to the steepness of the island as a whole. It all started to look like the Lake District. All very hilly and beautiful. Reminds you off a walnut. The inclusive dinner was pretty non-descript. Worth the trip to experience the highs and lows of the drive.

The cabaret that night over dinner was very funny as usual, there were some singers and dancers, and all I could remember was trying not to burst out laughing going up for my dessert when I saw girl being lifted in the air, legs spread akimbo and her modesty only protected by a thong. Those OAP's didn't half get an eye full at the front. Some old boy had to take off his specs for a clean whilst his friend couldn't stop videoing!

Those crazy hotel capers.

5th day - It was a bit cloudy to begin with so we had a leisurely walk into town, via some shopping centres. Popped into Blandy's wine lodge for some free tasting. Obviously they had a very wide range of Madeira wine. It was interesting to try the very dry versions. Had lunch in the old town again. Prices seem a lot more reasonable there.

Had coffee at the Golden Gate cafe which was well recommended by others on the internet. They had very nice cakes there. This half-board is getting to my stomach and waist-line!

6th day - Today there was rain and snow! Just like Cyprus then. At least the snow was when we were up in the hills and not in Funchal. The East excursion wasn't as good as the West one and they weren't that cheap. If you want to go on just one, choose the West excursion.

The village of Santana had those triangular looking houses that you can see on the postcard. It was very small and I was expecting a lot more. We'd only stop at various places for a 10 minutes or so as most places didn't have much going for them.

Our tour was very nice and told of some of the silly EU rules that stop Madeira from exporting their delicious small and sweet bananas because they didn't conform to the right shape!

Had a couple of drinks in Pub No. 2 which was just over the road from the hotel. Pleasant place for a drink and full of Portugese which is always a good sign.

7th day - We went down by the pool to catch some sun but the clouds came in. However, we braved the dark clouds for 15 mins, shivering away whilst everybody else went in giving us strange looks, then it was glorious sunshine for an hour or so. Micro-climates eh! They did warn us about it.

Found a superb fish place called "Restaurante by the Sea", by the Atlantic Gardens aparthotel. Someone had mentioned it and we got the hotel reception to book a taxi for us to get there. It was very Portugese and right up my street. It looked like it is set in a small cavern at the base of a hill with not too many tables so get there early.

The prawns, squid and octopus were cooked in a very simple way and simply delicious. We had a bottle of Mateus Rose (9 euros), which I had not drank since a teenager, which went down a treat. Funny how things you don't normally drink, taste fantastic on holiday. We have had some since we returned and the novelty quickly wore off.

Two coffees, two Madeira wines and a dessert later and it was only 51 euros for it all. If you are into seafood and are not too fussy about a nice clean touristy restaurant then give it a try. About 10 mins drive away from our hotel but well worth the trip. Don't let everyone know as I expect a table when I go back.

We popped into the Atlantic Gardens aparthotel for a couple of cocktails before asking their reception to get a taxi back.

Conclusions - on reflection I would not have gone half board seeing as there were many places to eat. The half board option cost 19 pounds per person which is nearly 60 euros for dinner, and no drinks neither. You could eat and drink very well outside of the hotel for lot less than that.

Hotel food and entertainment were fine if you are into that sort of thing. Funchal has many restaurants so you won't go without. The hotel zone is a bit lacking, too clinical for me. Funchal town has a lot more to offer.

The Madeira Carlton was very handy for getting into town but also had nice bars and restaurants within a few yards. Its amazing how those bus drivers get those coaches around those narrow streets. Dodge those timeshare touts down by the marina and across the bridge to Reids.

I would recommend Madeira if you are looking for somewhere to chill out. Not heavy on nightlife but the food is very good.